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Sports"Chloe, do something!"
My mind comes rushing back to the stuffy sports hall
My class are staring at me expectantly.
I look at the old, dull basketball at my feet,
And half-heartedly throw it
Out of court.
I hear a chorus of 'boos'
"Nice one, loser"
"Gee, what a throw"
Sarcastic comments are hurled at me as the other girls run past,
Their long, tanned legs barely covered by the regulation PE shorts.
I look down my pale, thin and bruised knees.
At least I'm small enough
For the shorts to cover the trail of cuts
On my thigh.
I retreat back into the corner of the court
Waiting for the bell to ring,
And send me to an hour of maths.
As I walk out of the changing rooms,
I hear cackles behind me:
"Can't even throw a ball"
"I don't think she's ever made eye contact, like, ever!"
I run away with tears pouring down my cheeks.
Holding a pack of gauze
To the line of
Running down my arm,
I replay the sounds I heard
During sports class.
The voices change,
everything is a threat.
My coat flung over the chair
is a man slouched,
waiting for me to wake
The pile of clothes in the corner
is a murderer crouching in the dark
waiting for me to sleep
The sound of cars outside the window
is a single car
for my light to turn on
The creak outside my room
Is a rapist
about to push the door open
The wardrobe is a monster
The shelves contain guns
The mirror is staring at me
The rug is a hole in the floor
waiting to swallow me up
I wish I wasn't so afraid all the time
I wish I could sleep
But I can't,
So I wait
For the darkness
Trouble LurkingI look through the greasy windows of a small, out-of-town diner, full of middle-aged lorry drivers working the night shift. They are tired, lonely, a pain to look at. But the image of the creature serving them coffee is suffice to endure the sight.
She is small, and young, with a tiny figure. Her large brown eyes carry hope and eagerness, and the corners of her mouth are upturned as her customers bluntly ask for a refill.
These minute details help me to build a vague idea of her story. I'm thinking...
New to the area. She works nights so she can use her days for auditions and rehearsals.
I sigh at the stereotype.
As the dim light flashes against the shine of her hair when her head turns, my heart leaps. The red strands are long and soft, aching to be stroked.
I bite my lip and resist the urge to push open the double doors and step onto the cheap, green linoleum tiles.
The seconds tick by like hours, until she retreats back into the kitchen. I finally let out the breath I have been hold
Drive"Are we nearly there yet?" Michael asks
His head pounding
His eyes closing
The parents sigh
Their minds on the map,
The road ahead
The pressure to reach home before nightfall.
His eyes rest on the falling droplets on the window where he rests his head.
The cars behind
Blow their horns
Preventing Michael from falling into the
In which he is so familiar.
The cars beside theirs,
Identically stranded on the motorway
Each provide a different story,
A different life
A different past and future.
Michael's eyes wander into each of the square windows
Drinking in the wonders
Of Human Life.
A young woman,
Rests her eyes in the daily jam
On her way home from work.
A teenage girl
Her father at the wheel
Listens to her white Ipod classic
Her arm against the window
A man laughs on his headset
An old woman
With the bags under her eyes.
So many lives
So many stories
He rubs his eyes
To Die... and Understand This.I almost wish for death
Upon my awakening
In the morning
These fake smiles
Declarations of happiness
I am tired of adorning
I wish to take a knife and open up my veins
I want to steal a gun and shoot it through my brains
I want to swallow all the pills in sight
I need to tighten a rope and tie it to the greatest height
I'd love to jump into a lake and never come back
I could just stop breathing
Hold my breath forever
If you were a samurai
Your middle name would be seppuku
If I were a Queen
I'd hail the guillotine
And proudly hang my head
If the world were to end tomorrow
I would laugh in the face
Of every stupid soul who cried 'unfair!'
For that blessing would be just too rare
If a murder crept
Into my home
I'd spare him
The possible hesitance
And make him do it
If somebody said
"I'm going to kill you"
Should I be so rude
As to not hold them to their word?
This wish for death may be a curse
But to me
It helps me to see
The truth in the world
Food is but sustenance
Mentally fucked and no one gives a damn.I'm fairly positive I have bipolar disorder but I don't know because my parents don't believe me when I tell them so they won't get me tested and I think I have ADD or ADHD but they won't get me tested for that either and also depression but I'm afraid to even tell them that because they won't believe me or they'd start questioning me because I'm they're perfect little daughter who's always happy and smiling.
People will probably tell me to go ahead and get help, no matter what my parents say, which would make sense, but my dad scares me. He wouldn't let me take aspirin for a headache and still made me go to church when I felt like dying. I told him I think I might have bipolar disorder and he just shoved it off like it was nothing. It can't hurt to get tested, right? But he doesn't even think it's a big enough problem to get tested.
All for youWhat I wouldn't give
to look into your eyes,
to be at your side,
to be happy all our lives,
nothing to extravagant.
Being around you,
hearing your voice,
feeling your heart beat,
curling up to you, so comfy.
It's all you have to do,
it's you who makes me so happy.
But, of course, this can't be,
not until everything is ready,
until we have a place, only you and me,
until then our sides stay empty,
until we can be together again, so happy.
I hate this distance between us.
I wish I could just drop it all and run,
run to the one who feels so right,
the one who I want to make smile,
and give everything to, for a happy life.
I know you are the right one for me,
no one has ever made me so happy
by simply being next to me.
I know this is meant to be,
I just have to, somehow, wait patiently.
I look forward to us being together,
nothing to get in the way ever.
each day will get better and better,
as we work to further
our lives, happy, and with each other.
So...So, I'm sat in maths class, sketching away on a scrap piece of paper. I decided to do a emo girl, with the hair and the clothes. I even drew a My Chemical Romance t-shirt, just for the hell of it, and why not? I wasn't doing anything anyway.
Unfortuantely, I was sat next to a rather thick individual who I frequently question why the hell he is in the top set. And I put it down to listen to the teacher, who was going through answers. I don't love maths, but I want to be a scientist, so I was distracted.
And he reaches across for this sketch, and manages to get a look before a realise what he's doing. Now, he turns round to me with this grin on his face, cause he knows he's going to make fun infront of the WHOLE class.
"Are you cutting yourself?"
And I flare up, cause I have a really short temper, 2nd February, Tiger. "No! I bloody don't! And I did, it's none of your business." I snap, and everyone's looking at me. Or at least I think they're not.
And then when I leave, someone comes up
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^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More